Asap help with getting a two bedroom house/apartment please.
my name is Courtney. Really, life is crazy! And I'm trying. I'm a single mom. Of a beautiful smart little life saver. She's my everything. She is my reason to believe it gets better. So a few years ago I was with a man and he was on his way to come see me and got into a car accident and died, a few years before that I was with my first boyfriend ever he was very abusive. The only person that stuck up for me was my best friend. And he beat him up for it. We went home and then I got beat up for it (this was in 2013 so yeah I was young.) And later on that Sunday my best friend took his own life. So for years I blamed myself. For not leaving for thinking he would change. For the only person who tried to save me dying. And now I just got out of a relationship and it was so great at first. He was the first person I cared for in a while. He knew parts of me even I didn't know and he ended up using everything against me. He started beating me up. He threw me into walls, because he cheated on me. He threw fans at me. Pushed me up against walls with threats. Became my worst night mare. And my best dream. In the same sentence. An abusive relationship is so much more than just physical abuse.. It's being broken beyond any thought possible, my money was taken so I couldn't go do anything or move without him, my self esteem broken, my smile, my laugh, my soul, my family and friends were pushed away. I found a place I'm just trying to figure out the money. Please maybe point me in the right direction. All I ever wanted was to give my daughter everything, a better childhood than I had. And here i am screwing that all up. I'm failing at the one thing in life im supposed to make sure i succeed at. I don't even know where to start. I just want a second chance.. To start all over again and just be all about me and her.... And maybe eventually i can go back to college.. . I want to be the best me i can be for her.. Shes 3. Shes soaking everything up right now. I want her to know she can get through anything and in order to show her she can do that, i have to do that. And lately im not so sure i can.....that stereotype of a woman with a black eye, split lip or whatever is only a small part of the whole picture of abusive relationships. Domestic violence includes rape, sexual assault, robbery, and aggravated and simple assault by partners, immediate family members, or other relatives and friends. I lost everyone I feel like. The few friends I did have now want nothing to do with me i think because they are afraid of him? I'm not really sure. Im confused. So confused on how the people I love with my whole heart and soul can leave me out all alone when i need them the most... I am just looking for any kind of help i can get. I have tried so many different sites. It's been a month now. And im still trying to get help. I know of plenty of places for rent now its just getting a call back from one. Or being able to look at one. I also need assistance with security and first months rent and putting furniture in it... Thank u for ur time Courtney P.s. I'm from steuben county ny Looking to be pointed in the right direction for maybe an advocate to help apply for Grant's answers such or help reach out about clothes, furniture, rent help for a new place etc. It gets exhausting telling my story again and again. P.s no one will help me find a place says I have to go into shelter then they will help. I don't want to stay with strangers. Trust is a huge problem for me. P.s if a landlord can give me paperwork showing how much rent is so I have the right stuff to get help, i can probably be ready with the money to move in tomorrow. I so badly need an apartment. I miss my daughter so much. I dont want my daughter to walk in my footsteps. But I do want her to walk next to me, and even past me. Way further than I ever even dreamt possible. I want her to be the best little her she can be. And for that to happen i need to be the best me. And I feel like I'm not doing a good job right now. We just need a home so we can be back together. I miss her so much. "We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked, and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for is the greatest poverty. We must start in our own homes to remedy this kind of poverty" Mother Teresa "Homelessness is not a choice, but rather a journey that many find themselves in." Asa Don Brown Okay yes. I was putting up with stuff I never should have. I was keeping my mouth shut about it. For months. But now I left. And I'm telling my story. I'm not going to let the fact that everyone left me behind because I choose to be loyal to what is right and not to a person because they are wrong. I'll always stand up for that and my right to be happy. I found myself. Now please help me find a home
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